You've watched a fly do it. It flies into the window, bounces off, and goes again. And again. Every time, it seems sure the next go will get it through.
That fly has plenty of willpower. It never gives up. It's persistent. And it's stuck, because persistence on the wrong plan just keeps you where you are.
We all do it
Think about diets. Strict for a few weeks, then a binge, then back on the diet, round and round. Or someone trying to give up sugar who has one big slip and thinks, what's the point?
It shows up everywhere. Health, business, relationships. Same window, same bump.
Get honest first
If what you've been doing isn't working, it might be time to try something different. That starts with being really honest with yourself.
Notice what you're actually doing, as well as what you think you're doing. Are your intentions and your actions pulling the same way?
Your destination doesn't have to change. You might just need a different way of getting there. The fly doesn't need to give up on the garden. It needs to find the open window.
Changing shape
We all go through phases of reinventing ourselves. Caterpillar, then chrysalis, then butterfly. Accept the change when it comes, and get ready to fly.
Two posts that need each other
I wrote this two weeks after How to achieve the impossible, which tells you to be relentless and keep going. Side by side, I think the two need each other. Keep going, yes. Just check you're not flying at glass.
If you're not sure where to start, the first step in The ABC of change is accepting where you are right now.
Pick one thing you keep trying that keeps not working. Write down honestly what you're actually doing, then choose one different thing to try this week.
First published May 2018.
