First published 10 August 2020 on Your Best Year Starts Here with Nigel Risner.
Listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.
Nigel reckoned it had been about six months since I'd been round his house, so this one was recorded in his home with a decent gap between our chairs. I'd brought new kit with me. According to Nigel I was like a little boy with new toys (fair). He asked if I was going to say "unprecedented" about lockdown. I wasn't. I'd rather say physical distancing than social distancing, and Nigel's gone off "remote workers" for much the same reason.
What was really bugging me was all the lockdown advice telling people to run their business like a boss. I hate that phrase. The idea for this came to me in the shower, and I had to grab something to write on when I got out. B is for bully, because being a boss is about control. O is overpowering, my way or no way, even if your idea's better. And the two S's are scare, using fear as a tool, and shame. That's the one where people feel they can't leave, even though they're desperate to be anywhere else.
Nigel thinks that's why so many bosses never wanted people working from home. Since 23 March they've lost control, and plenty of teams have done better without someone stood over them. I've done some odd jobs over the years, including a student summer printing the labels that get stuck on fruit. In a lot of those places the people who said they delegated didn't mean it. Nigel calls them pure perfectionists, only happy when there's a mistake to point at.
An ex-business partner once asked me where I'd ever find people who come to you with a problem and a couple of possible fixes. You build that. If every idea gets shot down because it doesn't match yours, people stop bringing them.
Then Nigel owned up to making fun of someone in one of his talks and realising about ten minutes too late that they were the boss of the organisation. I squeezed in a last bit on shame and guilt. Guilt is about the behaviour. A boss makes it about the person.
Worth remembering
- My B.O.S.S. is bully, overpowering, scare and shame. Worth checking yourself against it now and then.
- Delegating means handing over the job and letting them come back when it's done. Standing over their shoulder doesn't count.
- If you want people who bring ideas, stop telling them why their ideas are wrong.
- Bad bosses usually had bad bosses. It's learned, which means you can spot it in yourself.
- If you can't change a bad boss, change your position.
Trying to change a bad boss, it's like trying to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of time, and it annoys the pig.
Nigel Risner
Doesn't matter what you ask them to or what you tell them to do, it's the example you lead.
Neil Martin
