First published 31 December 2018 on Your Best Year Starts Here with Nigel Risner.
Listen on Spotify.
Episode one ended with Nigel saying the words "psychic vampires" and then the buzzer cut us off, so that's where we picked up. His point is simple enough. Some people in your life have a stake in things not working for you. Lose three pounds and there's always one friend who tells you you're looking too thin.
At work Nigel calls them internal terrorists. They're the people at the next desk setting up barriers for you, and sometimes they're your biggest competition. His example was his accountant wanting the £4.80 toll receipt every time he drove over the bridge into Wales (the tolls had just gone, to his great relief). To be fair to the accountant, Nigel also says some people aren't draining you at all. They just haven't been trained, or don't know the rules.
I told the story of one of my first blogs. A family member asked who I thought I was, and I stopped. It took me something like 18 months to get going again. Later a friend of my wife's said my blog was a bit dry and didn't sound like me. That one was fair. I'd been writing like I worked for the BBC.
Nigel de-hires two clients at the end of every year, and he told me I'd just made the cut. Like the bottom three going down in the Premiership, which makes room for three new teams. That got me onto the client types from one of my keynotes. A is the avatar, the one you'd copy over and over. B is beware, and they can sometimes be trained into an A. C is see ya. Nigel was a bit worried about what the C stood for.
We finished on how I judge a day. When my head hits the pillow, am I okay with myself? And for once the buzzer didn't go off.
Worth remembering
- Write down two people you won't spend time with over the next six months.
- Some people aren't against you. They just don't know the rules yet.
- B clients can sometimes be trained into A clients. The see ya ones need to go.
- If you'd be worried about a client overhearing what you say about them after the call, you shouldn't have them.
- Dropping a few clients or people makes room for new ones. You don't have to change the whole league.
If you're scared what you might say about them when in theory the phone was put down, you shouldn't be having that client.
Nigel Risner
My judge of whether something's been a good day or not is when my head hits the pillow, am I okay with myself?
Neil Martin
